I've been thinking about him a lot lately.
I wrote this poem for Jason Ortega when he passed away. His death ripped me apart. He was my father figure. No one has ever read it. A few months ago I gave it to his mom Pat. I told her she wasn't allowed to read it in front of me. Mrs. Ortega sent me the sweetest message after reading it. I know it meant a lot to her. She loved spending time with Jeri and I when we were kids, when we hung out with our favorite 'uncle'-dad ever.
Waiting for you to show and talk
Water flowing underneath my feet
As the Sun pours its light onto me
I want you to tell me that it’s just not real
To explain all these emotions that I feel
But
I sit alone at the edge of the dock
Waiting for you to show and talk
Water flowing underneath my feet
As the Sun pours its light onto me
We had swept across our reflections on this very lake
As life watched us laugh until our faces would ache
Remember when I told you I was afraid of girls as I cast my reel?
I still am and I need you to tell me again this fear is not real
But
I sit alone at the edge of the dock
Waiting for you to show and talk
Water flowing underneath my feet
As the Sun pours its light onto me
You were the first adult to tell me I was smart and strong
I always wanted to tell you that you were right all along
I once hid my chest scar from people and you asked why
You said God did it to show me off and my eyes went dry
But
I sit alone at the edge of the dock
Waiting for you to show and talk
Water flowing underneath my feet
As the Sun pours its light onto me
I want you to tell me that it’s just not real
To explain all these emotions that I feel
… feel…
J.Q. Lewis
-----------------
After seeing Batman in the theater, you told me, a little hurting boy, a boy who couldn’t read or talk well, who was sick a lot, that he could be just like Batman. “Every comic book hero went through something painful. Being a hero hurts. No one cares about the feelings of the hero. But that doesn't stop them from being a hero.” And I will never forget that. Ever. I've said it myself to a few other kids.
Thank you for making me believe I was strong, even when I was weak.
Thank you for screaming for me so loud during wrestling matches you were asked to leave the building.
Thank you for teaching me how to use/steer/work a canoe by continually throwing me out of one.
Thank you for giving me confidence and teaching me, with my dad, about the woods, hunting, and fishing.
When I won that adult shooting competition as a kid I felt like you were more proud of me than anyone.
Thank you for always reminding me that life can be fun if I actually let it be.
Thank you for teaching me that everyone deserves second chances.
Thank you for making sure I knew that no matter how much pain and hurt I go through, there is no excuse to treat others with the same.
Jason, you were the first 'father' to tell me you loved me.
And I love you too.
God knew I needed you in my life.
And I will always thank Him for you.
I wrote this poem for Jason Ortega when he passed away. His death ripped me apart. He was my father figure. No one has ever read it. A few months ago I gave it to his mom Pat. I told her she wasn't allowed to read it in front of me. Mrs. Ortega sent me the sweetest message after reading it. I know it meant a lot to her. She loved spending time with Jeri and I when we were kids, when we hung out with our favorite 'uncle'-dad ever.
J
I sit alone at the edge of the dockWaiting for you to show and talk
Water flowing underneath my feet
As the Sun pours its light onto me
I want you to tell me that it’s just not real
To explain all these emotions that I feel
But
I sit alone at the edge of the dock
Waiting for you to show and talk
Water flowing underneath my feet
As the Sun pours its light onto me
We had swept across our reflections on this very lake
As life watched us laugh until our faces would ache
Remember when I told you I was afraid of girls as I cast my reel?
I still am and I need you to tell me again this fear is not real
But
I sit alone at the edge of the dock
Waiting for you to show and talk
Water flowing underneath my feet
As the Sun pours its light onto me
You were the first adult to tell me I was smart and strong
I always wanted to tell you that you were right all along
I once hid my chest scar from people and you asked why
You said God did it to show me off and my eyes went dry
But
I sit alone at the edge of the dock
Waiting for you to show and talk
Water flowing underneath my feet
As the Sun pours its light onto me
I want you to tell me that it’s just not real
To explain all these emotions that I feel
… feel…
J.Q. Lewis
-----------------
After seeing Batman in the theater, you told me, a little hurting boy, a boy who couldn’t read or talk well, who was sick a lot, that he could be just like Batman. “Every comic book hero went through something painful. Being a hero hurts. No one cares about the feelings of the hero. But that doesn't stop them from being a hero.” And I will never forget that. Ever. I've said it myself to a few other kids.
Thank you for making me believe I was strong, even when I was weak.
Thank you for screaming for me so loud during wrestling matches you were asked to leave the building.
Thank you for teaching me how to use/steer/work a canoe by continually throwing me out of one.
Thank you for giving me confidence and teaching me, with my dad, about the woods, hunting, and fishing.
When I won that adult shooting competition as a kid I felt like you were more proud of me than anyone.
Thank you for always reminding me that life can be fun if I actually let it be.
Thank you for teaching me that everyone deserves second chances.
Thank you for making sure I knew that no matter how much pain and hurt I go through, there is no excuse to treat others with the same.
Jason, you were the first 'father' to tell me you loved me.
And I love you too.
God knew I needed you in my life.
And I will always thank Him for you.
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