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J.Q.
I like to make others laugh and smile. I enjoy myself. I have white skin.

Elevator Accelerator

I don't like elevators; however, when I find myself in one I want the ride to be pleasant from start to finish.

Many times I have found myself starting on the first floor in an elevator. I have the elevator all to myself. The elevator will come to the 2nd floor. A fellow passenger walks in. We share the awkward "I don't know you but let's be alone in a closed area for a few minutes" look. Sometimes a greeting will be said between the two of us.

The '5' button will be lit up when the new person enters. That's my destination. I'm going to the 5! I think it'd be a good idea if I were to look over to my friend and say, "Hey, if you're going to 5, I've got her pressed...just enjoy the ride my friend...I've done the work for us both." Perhaps that will avoid future button pushing.

Why does he have to push '5'? It's already lit up! Why does he have to touch it? Does he have a magic index finger or thumb? Did the button whisper to him that it needed more 'mmmph'? If the light is on, that means he's been activated. Gosh, lay off new guy.

It always entertains me when someone walks into an elevator with me at the same time. He will press the '2' or so. The elevator door won't shut as fast he would like. So, he keeps pressing that '2'. I find myself wanting to whisper, "It's not a fast-forward button idiot, stop breathing, you don't deserve the air in our box." It'd be more entertaining to just yell, "I'M NOT READY FOR WARP SPEED", and throw yourself backward into the elevator wall behind you as if to grasp it and close your eyes.

Elevator buttons need to be only pressed once.

Comments

Anonymous said…
Funny, yesterday I am at Erlanger Hospital's parking garage. I enter from the ground floor and a lady enters. I press "2" and just as the door closes she presses "ground" which snaps the door back open. I say to here maybe "one" is where you want to go, she presses one, but now we have to stand there bathed in her stupiditiy as we wait for the door to close
February 17, 2009 at 9:38:00 AM EST
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